PhD In Bag Theory

Misunderstanding no.1 - Girls purchasing bags is obsessive, dramatic and excessive. Why are there thirty tabs open with the same bag in different retail websites? Why is she watching vogue’s “what’s in your bag” videos at 2 a.m? Why is she reading a research paper about stitching quality?

This is research.

A bag is not just an accessory. It will appear in photographs, sit on cafe tables, attend birthday parties, airport lounges, and bad dates. It’s not just purchased, it is chosen to be the one, the one that stands by your side in embarrassing moments and heart breaks. So, doesn't it deserve to be studied? 

Okay, lemme make you understand another life theory you most likely misunderstood. And, for the girls (and the sane guys who think bags do not think bags are for girls and the gays), remember these before you buy any bag:

1. Learn the history of the house: Yes, bags do have a history, and the value of this needs to be learnt before you make it your little arm candy (I hate that word). In your normal people's terms, it's like someone is employed for a certain task or  work to do without knowing your name.

2. Understand the leather type: Oh, there can be whole another blog written about this. You need to assess how it will age? How will it scratch? Does it hold structure? Will it slouch in six months? How heavy it feels? Whether the resale value holds? Blah blah blah, too much to write about.

3. Compare hardware finishes: This is very important for the styling versatility and sometimes to match your skin tone. Hardware is like jewellery to your bag, there is gold, silver, champagne, light gold, gunmetal, and it goes on and on. (disclaimer - gold hardware can show scratches more obviously, silver hardware can lose shine over time, some gold hardware is plated over brass, most are coated alloys and the thickness of the plating affects shelf life)

4. Know the resale value: Everyone needs resale knowledge. If you bought a $4,000 bag your question shouldn’t be “can I afford this?” it should be “how much will I lose if I change my mind?”. Know that if your bag holds 80%-100% of its value the risk is low, but if it immediately drops to less than 50%, it's your loss. (honestly, this is the most math I have done in my entire life)

5. See if influencers killed it by overexposing it: This one is kinda personal, it’s not at all mandatory. When a bag is hard to see, hard to get, and is like a rare animal species, it’s sort of elevated. I dont wanna see the same bag I am carrying in the back of a grwm video and sent to 200 influencers in PR. Just have a thought, do you want it to be a long term identity piece or just another instagram artifact. 

If I continue this will be a doctoral level discipline.

Most importantly, research is half the pleasure. 

In conclusion, can someone please please please (the Sabrina Carpenter way) buy me the Ferragamo Hug soft crossbody bag with feathers, in black and white, and in the size extra small (the retail value is 60% - 90%), thanks.